#2: Heartbreak Cake

It's becoming slightly pathetic how therapeutic I'm actually starting to find this baking/blogging combination. With that being said, I'm also thoroughly beginning to enjoy spreading my JOY OF BAKING to others around me: take Saturday night. My friend needed a picker upper, and naturally what do I come to the rescue with? CAKE... and nachos... and burritos... and sodas with pebble ice. Uh, yum. The cake I chose to make is called, um, well... "Better than Sex Cake," but for the sake of this blog, and for the sake of me shouting across church the recipe I had most recently tried, I've renamed it "Heartbreak Cake." Seriously though. This concoction contains everything a woman needs post break-up/giant disappointment: chocolate, caramel, toffee, whip cream... my goodness, I already swore to Nichelle that if my daughters ever come home one night crying over a man, this will be the first thing I plunk down in front of them... and then they'll be over 400 pounds and unable to FIND a date, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

This is only one of several varieties of "Better than Sex Cake" I found on the internet. Evidently there are thousands of women across the U.S. who supplement their lack of... adult entertainment... with cake. I'm not SURE if this really IS better than said activity... but I'll let you be the judge, since who am I to make that call, HONESTLY?! Ladies and gentlemen, I bring you Heartbreak Cake:

As adapted from http://allrecipes.com

Ingredients:

1 18.25 ounce package of devil's food cake mix (I used Betty Crocker... I know, I know, I cheated using a mix. The next time I make a cake, I promise I'll make it from scratch!)

1/2 a 14 ounce can of sweetened condensed milk (I chose to use fat free, attempting to make this a LITTLE less sinful)

6 ounces caramel ice cream topping (I definitely used more than that. Just do what I did- go out and buy the giant 20 ounce squeeze bottle of Smuckers caramel ice cream topping...)

3 1.4 ounce bars of chocolate covered toffee, chopped (Heath Bars, darlin')

1 8 ounce container of frozen whipped topping (Light Cool-Whip for me)

Directions:

1. Bake cake according to the directions in a 9X13 inch pan; let cool on a wire rack for 5 minutes. Make slits across the top of the cake, making sure not to go through to the bottom.

     - I one upped this. I also made holes in the cake using the back of a spoon in between the slits. I wanted an extra-gooey cake, thank you!

2. In a saucepan over low heat, combine sweetened condensed milk and caramel topping, stirring until smooth and blended. Slowly pour the warm topping mixture over the top of the warm cake, letting it sink into the slits; then sprinkle the crushed toffee bars liberally over the entire cake while still warm. 

     - Leave the pieces of Heath bar a little bigger; that way you have something to crunch on!

3. Let cake cool completely (I had it sitting for about 45 minutes), then top with whipped topping. Decorate the top of the cake with more of the chocolate toffee chunks and swirls of caramel sauce. Refrigerate and serve right from the pan. 

So easy, so stinkin' good. I know it's gonna kill you, but I highly recommend making this the night before and letting it refrigerate overnight. We tried it that same night, and it was so-so (talk about devastating for me!), but the next day it had all combined together. Soooo much better chilled!